Beer: Quake

My experiences with Quake, a brand of the Cold Spring Brewery in Minnesota, are worth saving from RateBeer. First:

I should have known better, really. I mean, here was this 22-ounce bottle of 8.2 beer on sale at Whole Foods for 99 cents, which should have set off alarm bells. I did feel like the beer equivalent of a wino, buying it.

And then I tasted it. Oh my. I managed like three horrified sips. Indescribable. Truly a gruesome experience.

So now I'm really looking forward to the huge bottle of Quake Chocolate Cream Ale that I also purchased for 99 cents. Not. Actually, I confess that I'm afraid of it. I'm afraid of a bottle of beer.

Then:

After having one of my most indelibly unpleasant beer experiences ever with a 99 cent, 22 ounce bottle of Quake Red Cream Ale, the burning question was, could Quake Chocolate Cream Ale live up to such negative perfection? I am happy to report, that and more so! Two mouthfuls were enough to prove the point; as for the rest of it, down the drain it went! I must find Quake Honey Cream Ale and complete my Quake troika of horror.

But I never did find it, and will have to be content imagining the third side of the triangle. All the Quake ales appear to have been discontinued, a mercy to mankind.